"Laaaaa laaaaa laaaaa laaaa... wait till I get my money right "is the opening line to the popular jingle by Kanye West entitled "Can't Tell Me Nothing".
I ran across this piece of junk while searching for "cant tell me nothing" on youtube. Initially I was grossly disappointed to say the very least, and also quite confused. However, the video becomes really humorous as it progresses. The maker of the video Zach Galifianakis gives his "special" interpretation of Kanye's newest hit single. Unlike other, low budget (LOL) youtube parody videos, Galifianakis appears to put much thought and sweat into the production of this masterpiece (really now..).
His country flavored (flavoured for the English) spin is some what refreshing and light as the topics ranted on in Kanye's poetic tirade are far from shallow. But I've said too much. Have a look for yourself.
Pay special attention to the tractor with "hydraulics" and the video girls on the hill doing riverdance!
"Recent Poles have shown that a fifth of Americans can't locate the U.S on a world map. Why do you think this is?"
First of all, this question seems very elementary and trivial to me, VERY trivial as a matter of fact. Now let me attempt to analyze this seemingly frivolous brain buster.
"Recent poles" - So the question is based on some form of a fact, though we may not be cognizant of the specifics behind the polling done.
"A 1/5th of Americans" - So are we including immigrants, green card holders, people who were born and grew up in America? America's population is roughly 300 million. 300 million multiplied by 1/5 equals 60 million.
So it can be inferred from the above statement that approximately 60 million Americans(possibly including immigrants) cannot locate the U.S on a world map.
Say this is a couple times;
"60 million Americans cannot locate the U.S on a world map" (Keep going)
(mmm hmmm... dont stop yet)
(let it marinate for a while)
Now that we've grasped that premise. Lets take apart some keys parts of miss South Carolina's response.
(I am tempted to 'abort mission' as this is really pointless.. Did you really say some Americans don't have maps!?!?)
"I personally believe" First of all, if you're gonna say you "believe" something, its assumed and understood that this is your view - "personal" view. Maybe she used redundancy to accentuate her following point:
Now, the rest of what she said is kind of hard to unscramble. Seriously, here was my valiant attempt to decode it, "I believe our education, uh... such as South Africa, and Iraq, everywhere like, such as and.. I believe they should.. Our education over here should help the U.S"
What are you really talking about here!?!?!?!?!?!
It must be tough being on stage, being in the hot seat in front of thousands of people. However, you signed up for it, you were trained for it (I assume) and you certainly put on the gown and make up for it. I just don't think you had the uhhh.... head space? brain? No, thats harsh, you didn't have the composure for it. I have one question for you
Today I started my fourth semester of college and man was I not ready to be back in school! I had very few college supplies, most of which I had from previous semesters. That is, old pens, pencils and notebooks that were already used. I have no food in my apartment, and little or no money. Yes, I know you've thought it, I' m living the true college experience. But thats not all, I had to sleep on my couch for two days because I didn't have any bed linen, pillows etc. Additionally, I had no soap, toothpaste, nor other toiletries. You might be thinking, thats not college life, thats caveman life. Or maybe, your'e thinking if thats college life, I've been in college since birth (For your sake I hope not). Whichever echelon you may belong to it you can agree that not living in the comfort you would like is the pits.
"I thought you said this blog was about random junk from across the web?"
Not to worry good sir/madam, as promised here is my junk of the day! [ With a college touch ;-) ]
Think about your favorite collegiate sport. Now, think about your favorite collegiate team from that sport. Next.. (I'm going somewhere with this) Think about your favorite collegiate mascot.
Let me take a guess... Was it:
Sammy the banana slug? Probably not. But here's the thing, Sammy the banana slug is in my opinion the head of a very elite group of mascots. What group is that?
Mascots who never made it
Serving alongside Sammy the banana slug (University of California Santa Cruz) on the board of directors are:
Super frog the horned frog (Texas Christian University)
The fighting pickle (North Carolina school of arts)
Artie the fighting artichoke (Scottsdale community college)
The Bollweevil (University of Arkansas, Monticello)
Ever wondered how to make a chocolate cake from scratch? Probably not, seeing that you can buy one at your local pastry shop now for almost nothing. And if that fails you can buy the cake mix at the grocery store (mmmmm mmmmmm tasteeeee). Well guess what? Today is your lucky day! Why?
English is considered to be one of the more challenging languages to learn as a second language, even more so if you're just learning it as an adult. Here are my pet peeves and fascinations with the english language:
Pet peeves:
When to add a suffix, or prefix. For example, you can be disgruntled, but not grunlted. Huh?
Another one, information and formation have completely different meanings? Why?
However, you can be extraordinary one day, and ordinary the next.
Words spelled the same way or pronounced similarly have different meanings. In other words, read is the past tense of read. (Think about it) But they're spelled the same way.
"Yesterday I read time magazine" as opposed to " Tomorrow I am going to read newsweek"
See vs Sea. You can see through your eyes but you cannot sea through your binoculars. You fish in the sea but cannot swim with the dolphins in the see. Why not? I want hangout with my friends by the seeside. (lol)
How really sat down and coined the diction, and spelling etc of english terms and words. Whoever is responsible must have had a lot of time on their hands because they surely succeeded in making it complicated.
How am Important but not PORTANT!!!! I just don't get it! But one can be both impotent and POTENT. Sigh..
Some fun words that are spelled the same way backwards as they are forwards:
racecar (actually two words), deed, level, pip, rotor, civic, madam, eye, nun and toot. "A Toyota! Race fast, safe car. A Toyota" - spell that backwards and see what you get.
Its interesting how laws can vary as you go from state to state across America. Even more interesting is the contrast in lifestyle and culture as you venture outside the bounds of your country. Misconceptions and stereotypes are inevitable and contribute to very interesting conversation.
For example, Jamaicans are usually depicted as reggae listening, marijuana smoking, people of Rastafarian faith. However, the use of marijuana for non medicinal purposes in Jamaica is illegal. Additionally, dancehall a spin off from reggae has become much more popular than its parent genre reggae. Jamaica is a Christian country and has the largest number of churches per capita in the world (last time I checked). "Rastas", comprise a small but important population of the country
Here are some interesting American laws for the state of California:
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
It is hoped that you will be entertained and informed by the Junkiness of the Junkster in charge (Thats me). Junk may consist of, but is not limited to:
Interesting photographs from across the globe, especially Jamaica and/or U.S.A
Sayings from different countries, for example a Jamaican proverb "One one coco full basket" accompanied by an appropriate translation: Each effort or object no matter how small contributes equally to a bigger outcome :-)
A special segment called, "the junkiest oddest thing happened to me today"
Lastly, my opinion on things I consider to be weird and junkified :-) along with whatever InTeR WeB JuNk I can find around town.
